Black Magic 101
M A Davis / Miko
plot help from Todd Smith, William Morse, Sky Rigdon, Keith Alan Johnson, and Jeff Cornish
4-3-99
Hikaru Gosunkugi finished the arcane chant and held his breath.
Nothing seemed to happen. He glanced again at his "Cliff Notes Guide To the Necronomicon", just to be certain he'd done everything correctly.
Pentagram: check. True, it wasn't drawn in blood, or saltpeter, or even chalk, but at least the Hello Kitty magic sparkly marker (the one that smells like blue) had worked reasonably well. He had more than enough candles set up -- six times as many a required, to be precise. Would too many candles spoil the spell? Hikaru shrugged the thought off, certain that you could never have too many candles.
That left just the arcane chant. True, he wasn't entirely clear on how to pronounce whatever language the words were written in, but at least he'd spoken it loudly and plainly. That counted for something, didn't it?
Suddenly the temperature in the room dropped, and the lights dimmed. Within the encircled pentagram, smoke began to swirl, and then form into a recognizable shape. Moments later, the demon stood before Hikaru, ready to do his bidding.
Actually, it didn't so much stand, as float. Hikaru blinked, staring at the creature. He'd been expecting something more... well, more Lovecraftian, to be honest. But at least it had horns....
The green-haired girl in the tiger-striped bikini blinked back at him in confusion. "Where am I?" she asked. "Who are you? How did I get here?"
"You wouldn't, by chance, be a demon?" Hikaru asked.
"An oni," the girl corrected. She smiled brightly. "Is there something I can help you with?"
***
Hikaru redrew the pentagram carefully, using a piece of stolen school chalk. He studied it carefully, then nodded to himself in satisfaction. Yes, that looked much, much better.
Carefully he arranged the candles, being certain to not use more than necessary. With even more care, he chanted the ancient words, with careful, precise pronunciation.
He finished, and waited. A full ten seconds passed, then the temperature dropped. The light dimmed. The smoke swirled, and formed into a new, and hopefully better, demon.
Hikaru cursed softly to himself. This one didn't even have horns.
The green-haired girl floated in the air and regarded Hikaru with a very annoyed expression.
"I nearly had Tenchi to myself," she growled. "This had better be good."
***
Blood dripped from Hikaru's palm, mixing with the saltpeter that formed the lines on the floor. Candles of pure beeswax burned at each point of the pentagram -- Hikaru had blown a good portion of his savings on them. He glanced again at his pronunciation notes, painstakingly copied from an ancient tome found at the downtown Tokyo library.
This time, Hikaru thought, he had everything right. And, as he chanted the words, he could feel the truth of that statement. His entire body radiated with eldrich power. As he finished the last word of the spell, hope surged through him. This time, it was going to work!
The temperature dropped. The lights dimmed. The smoke swirled, and the humanoid demon formed....
This one didn't have green hair. It didn't float. It wasn't even female.
It was... well, mundane.
The young man wore a white shirt, a black tie, and black slacks. He was good looking, Hikaru supposed, but resembled not so much a demon, as a... high school teacher.
The man looked about the room, arching an eyebrow. "Demon summoning is a very dangerous undertaking," he said. He smirked, then bowed deeply. "Meisuke Nueno, at your service," he said, "but you can Nube Sensei."
"Nube... Sensei?" Hikaru repeated, his hopes falling. "Then you're not a demon either?"
"Well," the teacher said, holding up a gloved hand. "Part of me is...."
***
Hikaru tossed his Cliff Notes book into the garbage, along with his other magic paraphernalia. "That settles it," he said. "Magic is no way to gain riches and power." He glanced again at his newly-purchased book: 'Java For Dummies'. "My future's in programming, definitely!"
FINI